I am an oracle. Build me a cave with hallucinogenic vapors.
Or cordon off a spot in my basement by the cat box.
I shall move through multiple bedecking-phases like the inconstant moon. . .
To be multiply-bedecked -- or not to be.
Is that even a question?
I Am An Oracle: Build Me A Cave PART II
Totally wrong was I, however, about Mother’s Day. I built my kids a Vegan Legume Gas Dish (see post below, Lentil and Black Quinoa Salad: Pass the GasX and Happy Mother's Day) as a prize for gathering not JUST to celebrate me, but the imminent sale of waterfront property we partially own and, therefore, must make room in our basement to take occupancy, real quick, of stuff the new owners don’t want that we don’t want either – but it has to get OUT of the residence.
|THE Multi-Colored Roses|
They arrived at high noon with a breathtaking array of multi-colored roses and cards and hearty pirate appetites and several favorite board games, infragrant cigars and less fragrant internet links to hour-long boxing matches between Ali and Frasier and video of Mike Tyson Knockout Highlights set to music – all of which we enjoyed together on Mother’s Day … instead of removing from my basement amplifiers the size of a Kia Sportage and chunks of actual ex-vehicles and furniture pieces so horrifying, even our pets avoid them because, frankly, I believe they are haunted. They have lived in so many dwellings over the centuries, they have seen . . . a lot.
And a multi-purpose greeting card.
There was a rendering of a beautiful African American woman, her hands clasped together in loving delight.
The inside goes on, "Now that I'm older, I realize there are some things even a mama can't fix, but that you'll always do your best and . . . " etc. etc.
But the best part -- as I read it aloud in front of available family who still live in this country -- was the Mother’s Day ending at the bottom.
Even HE had not intentionally purchased a Mother's Day greeting card that technically celebrated my birthday.
Memorial Day where I am sure to open the greeting card, “Congratulations on your bris” and we can play Settlers of Catan Deluxe Expansion Pack and smoke stogies made of rolled bat droppings and watch video of wild boars eviscerating pygmies, set to the musical stylings of Nine Inch Nails.